Abi and the February 2015 Synchroblog -- Renewal

The Links for the Synchroblog are up...but will be updated, so I'll be back to add more later!

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re·new·al

rəˈn(y)o͞oəl/

noun

the replacing or repair of something that is worn out, run-down, or broken.

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The day after Epiphany, January 6, 2015, I picked up The Road Less Traveled, by M. Scott Peck, M.D. Something had triggered a thought from that book, and I went to the shelf to take a look. I'd read the whole book a few times over the past 30 years and have blogged here frequently on Peck over the past few years. 

But on January 7th, something made me start in the beginning and read the intro from the 25th anniversary edition (which I had decided to get on Kindle, so all the family's Kindle readers would be able to share)...and I just kept on going.

This was not going to be a reading bender, though.  I was going to process this. So I got out a notebook.  One of those One Subject Notebooks my teenagers use in school.  I was going to take notes.  Then I was going to condense "the main points" onto 3 x 5 cards.  This was serious.

What was serious was that I realized something that I just hadn't been able to see these past 30 years: I was not particularly disciplined.  I had bits of discipline. I was hard working. But I wasn't really disciplined.

I think it had something to do with general confusion surrounding the term.  Discipline had come to mean "punishment" somewhere along the way. Peck, however, defined it as the basic set of tools required for the task of problem solving. Without discipline--these four tools--we cannot solve anything.

I know I read the entire book, like two or three times.  I read these words. But I was not able to see or hear this.  I had plenty of other things that jumped out at me.  Maybe it was not time?  It certainly was time this go around!  [This, by the way, is why I am a firm believer in my Grandmother Kent's saying:  If it's worth reading once, it's worth reading 10 times.]

He goes on to say that the first problem is that confronting and solving problems is painful. Those feelings are uncomfortable.  Feelings like frustration, grief, sadness, loneliness, guilt, regret, anger, fear, anxiety, anguish, despair....

Problems, however, also call forth courage and wisdom.  They are catalysts for growth. They are part of the plan--not to hurt, injury or humiliate, but to challenge, stretch and inspire creativity.

Wise persons welcome problems--and their pain.

Peck believes that most of us are not wise...but we learn wisdom when we embrace the discipline pain can inspire. Embrace the pain.  See the problem. Engage the needed tools of discipline.  Learn and grow wiser!

But....

Somehow, there's always a "but" out there!

But fear of the pain leads to avoidance. Wishful thinking leads to procrastination as we hope that the problem will just go away if we ignore, forget, pretend...anything to get out of dealing with the problem and its pain, rather than suffer through the process in order to arrive at the solution.

Yeah, this is what Peck sees as the primary basis for all human mental illness...that tendency to avoid problems and the emotional suffering that goes with them.

And so I have begun a journey of renewal. Of going back and filling in for the things that I missed along the way.  For me that looks like understanding Discipline and forming it's four tools to my hand.

These tools, according to Peck, are:

1. Delaying gratification.  Doing the hard parts first to get them out of the way, so that the rest of my time is more available to serendipity.
2. Taking responsibility.  Owning my story and actions and the repercussions -- intended or not. This includes learning what is NOT my responsibility and NOT owning those things.
3. Dedication to the truth.  Always embracing the truth rather than dodging the facts. Always. Being willing to follow the facts all the way to the end, no simplistic thinking. Taking full inventory of who I am and what my motives are and how my thoughts and actions line up and where my blind spots are.
4. Balancing.  Keeping the bigger picture in mind. Stepping back and getting perspective. Bracketing out my presumptions and biases and prejudices and really listening to the other in order to understand and see things from their vantage point -- standing in their shoes and looking out from their eyes.

Yeah...I have not properly learned these lessons and these tools are not fully shaped in me.  But I'm on it now.  There is always time to work on important things.  Always.

Peck says that these tools and their development in children are the responsibility of parents. Sigh. Yes, I will agree.  And I have mourned the fact that we do not come with a parenting manual when our children are born.

But.

I have found one in the past two years that has ended my search for the right way. A way that is not full of guilt and shame and punishment and control. One that is full of love and grace and mercy. Yes, I would call it cHesed Parenting!  It is by Dr. Laura Markham and is called Peaceful Parenting, Happy Kids. I have had to process some significant grief as I mourn the fact that I did not have this book 20 years ago...and only am slightly assuaged by the fact that is was only published a few years ago.

This book.  It has saved my family...and my sanity.

As I have processed Peck's thoughts about discipline and how it is the responsibility of  the parents to first have it and then pass it on to their children, I mourned that I had passed what seemed like all the important deadlines for my children...even though I was searching for the path.

Added, then, to my work on building and shaping the Four Tools is the answer to the "how to parent" piece...and Dr. Laura reminds us frequently that it is never too late to be a better parent.  It is, however, much harder.

So be it.

I know all about hard.  As long as there is a path to peaceful and happy, I am totally ready for hard.

Bring. It. On.

This is the most important time of renewal I have entered.  I am grateful beyond words for this time and all the resources God has brought to me at just the right time and in just the right way.  I'm learning to lean into Their love and grace and mercy as I embrace The Great Dance of Perichoretic cHesed.

May this time of Lenten renewal be one of deep blessing and joy. May we all receive the peace of Jesus that our joy may be complete in Him.

Be blessed.

Abi

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This post is part of the February synchroblog “Renewal”

Abbie Waters – It is Well with My Soul

Done With Religion – Renewal

Mark Votova – 30 Ways the Church Can Find Renewal

Jeremy Myers – I am Dying … (So I Can Live Again)

Phil Lancanster – The Parable of the Classic Car

Susan Schiller – Renewal by Design

Glenn Hager – Repurposed

Wesley Rostoll – Why I no longer pray for revival

Clara Ogwuazor-Mbamalu – Renewal of the Spirit

K. W. Leslie – Those who wait on the Lord

Lisa Brown – Momma’s Kick Off Your Shoes and Stay For A While!

Jenom Makama – …Like An Antivirus

Leah – Renewal!

Abi and June's Synchroblog -- From Peggy...To Peggy

Update:  The Synchroblog Links are up and added at the end!

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This post is part of June's Synchroblog, where we were invited to travel back in time to the “You” of 10 or 20 years ago and tell yourself something you know now but wish you had known then

This is not as easy as one might think...given the Temporal Prime Directive, and all.  My post title is a reference to one of my favorite Star Trek: Voyager episodes.  The important line of advice from Captain Janeway to Harry Kim is:  "Well, if you won't take it from me, take it from you."

Temporal paradoxes are very complicated and trying to understand them will burn your brain up in a hurry...and if I was, in fact, able to go back in time and tell myself something very important...it would, undoubtedly change my timeline today.  That's the point, right?

There are so many things I have learned in the past four, er, eight years that I wish I had known 10 or 20 years ago. But calculating the when of this endeavor is of paramount importance. It can be any time after Memorial Day of 2000. So, I'm going back just over 14 years ago.

Why then?

Because if I change anything between October of 1992 and April of 2000, I risk the loss of the three most precious gifts God gave this earth through me:  my three sons.  (Cue 1960s music....)

And that is something that simply must not happen.

But there is a day that sometimes messes with me...still.  And if I could go back and change one thing that day, everything would change for me and my family...and it would perhaps mean that all traces of AbiSomeone, Virtual Abbess of the Purple Martyrdom, would disappear from the Internet.

Such are the risks one takes when playing with time.

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"Robert, could we turn right and take the scenic drive home, please? It is so beautiful with all the spring flowers blooming and the water in the creek is running so high and fast -- there is that little waterfall that should be just awesome.  Please?"

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On the 3rd of June, 2000, we were celebrating our oldest son's 5th birthday (a few weeks late) at our local Denny's. As we pulled out of the restaurant's driveway, I simply suggested that we turn right. I didn't say why. Maybe Robert didn't hear me...maybe he had other plans for the drive home...in any case, he turned left and we ended up at the front of the left turn lane, just as the light turned green.

Just then, as we accelerated, we heard the sound of a siren coming toward our intersection.  Robert stopped to ensure that the way was clear. The young man in the big pickup behind us didn't hear or see what was happening, and slammed right into us...our Mazda 929's bumper a good 8 inches lower than his steel bumper, which went straight into our trunk.

Right then all our lives changed.

My 5 year old and 17 month old sons, seemingly secure in their car seats, both suffered concussions as their heads were slammed back. Neurological damage is slow to manifest and even slower to resolve. I can't even talk about it...my heart is breaking all over again.

I knew I was pregnant -- just two weeks! Somehow I was turned toward the boys in the back seat, which is how I saw their heads bounce off the backs of their car seats. I sustained twisting injuries of my cervical spine/neck muscles and ligaments as well as of my L5/S1 vertebrae in my low back.

...and with a little over eight months more of ligament relaxing hormones pumping into my 44 year old, ever-changing, body mechanics, the prognosis for full restoration was not very hopeful.

That day my babies lost a mostly functional mommy and had to learn to make do with a very broken-down, purple one. This is not something that they have understood very well...especially the two little ones, who never really knew me "before"...but that is another story for another time, perhaps.

In particularly melancholic moments, I wonder if I would have even had the rest of my slew of injuries in the ensuing years...compounding, as it seems, from that first, catastrophic, injury.

"What if?" is a place where I have spent a lot of energy, these past 14 years.  It is not a good place to be -- because there is no time travel. And even if I had a Time Turner, I couldn't safely go back more than five hours. And the Omega 13 Device could only go back 13 seconds. Way too late for fixing....

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Nope, I can't go back. I must live fully in the present, forgiving the past as the best we knew how to do at the time. I must embrace the severe mercy of my beloved Triune God, whose merciful and loving grace faithfully works in and through all of our pain and suffering to bring into being amazing goodness that would not otherwise exist.

Suffering is part of the hard work of learning patience and compassion.  For myself...for others...for all of Creation.

Living in the past or living in the future are time wasters for me.  I need YHWH, the Present Presence, to keep me in the here and now...walking baby steps with Jesus in the midst of the darkness and nightmares.  We will get through to the light of morning.

I keep waking up every day.

We do not have the opportunity to deal with temporal paradoxes, but Perichoretic cHesed Paradoxes are all over the place for this wee, purple, forward-looking, Papa-trusting, Jesus-following, Sarayu-transformed abbess.

In due time God will restore what the locust has eaten.

But that will not be my doing -- I cannot fix any of that.  There is no magic wand...there is only embracing pain as the way of human learning.  I must walk in faith into what I am learning about who God is and who I am and what it is that I am to be doing:  receiving God's merciful loving kindness and returning it by sharing it with those God puts in my path.

...I'm happy not to lose all of my virtual fellow journey mates.... ;^)

Be blessed...and do read the rest of the bloggers, when the links are up!

Abi

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Here's the blog links!

• Justin Steckbauer – What Do You Wish You Knew 10 or 20 years ago?
• Michael Donahoe – What I Wish I had Known
• Mary – What I Wish I Would Have Known as a Newlywed
• Heather Wheat – As a Young Mother, I Wish I Had Known…
• Michelle – Ten Years of Wisdom
• Michelle – Twenty Years of Wisdom
• Wesley Rostoll – If I Could Speak to a Younger Version of Me
• Peggy – From Peggy … To Peggy
• Glenn Hager – The Reluctant Time Lord
• Carol Kuniholm – Life Lessons from Lydia
• Edwin Adrich – A Note to My Younger Self
• Paul Metler – A Note to my 20 Year Ago Self
• Liz Dyer – Dear Me
• Kathy Escobar – Never Say Never
• Jeremy Myers – A Letter to the “Me” of 15 Years Ago
• Kimberly Klein – Be Free, Be You
• Loveday Anyim – Hot Romance with the Dreams of the Sparkling Old Times
• Susan Cottrell - Be Kind To Yourself

Abi and April's Synchroblog: Bridging the Divides

Updated update!  The last stragglers have been added to the list.  I hope you wander through these thoughtful posts...take your time, they're not going anywhere!  ;^)

Update!  The list of the other participants in this Synchroblog are listed at the bottom of the post....

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It is always a miracle when I am able to participate in the Synchroblogs of my friends ... and when I first read the topic on this one, I was filled with turmoil.  You see, there is entirely too much division in my house...and the bridge that used to unite us was effectively blown up five years ago. I have been pretty much in survival mode since then.

Some bridges cannot be unilaterally built -- they require cooperation between those who possess the land on either side of the gulf that divides.  And so I wondered if I would have anything to say this month...that I was willing to say in public, that is.

But today I find that I have a few things to say!

The house that Jesus was talking about is the house of the Triune God, where Father, Jesus and Grandmother dwell in Perichoretic cHesed. Where there is such unity and togetherness that there is no other word to describe their reality other than that they are One. Interesting that the last Synchroblog in which I was able to participate was on that topic...kind of like a warm up to this one, eh?

Take a look at the entire story in Mark 3...see that the context is about whether Jesus is of God's house and just who make up the members of that household.

This little story tells two important things:  the Household of the Trinity cannot be divided...but the neighborhoods in the Kingdom sure can be.  This gives me a firm foundation as well as a firm reprimand. If Jesus gave no special place to his flesh and blood family, I should consider my priorities carefully too....

When I get all caught up in the distinctives of various neighborhoods, it is all too easy to forget the distinctives of the Kingdom.  Kingdom reality carries the proper pH -- not too acid nor too alkaline -- that sweet spot described by the number seven:  complete, whole and full -- where human life flourishes and homeostasis is possible:  Just Right!

When Jesus became human, it was a distinctive he would carry for the rest of Eternity.  And in that blend of Trinity and Humanity he took hold of all of creation. He became the first truly fully human; one who was not divided by the knowledge of good and evil, but united with Father and Grandmother as he hammered out what it meant to be fully human and fully God. He laid hold on his creation and took us down with him in death, where he entered fully into our fallen darkness and blindness. He put to death fallen humanity and voided Adam's sin. He fell with us into our hell ... and turned on the lights! When he rose from the grave, he bought all of creation back to life -- recreated!  In Christ there is no gap left to bridge. We have been included in the Perichoretic cHesed of the Trinity because we are IN Jesus. All humanity has been adopted through the New Covenant in Jesus.

The challenge he sent Grandmother to work out, when he returned to Father, was the education of the newly adopted children. This is no small challenge:  most of the children have not heard about (or do not believe) what Jesus has done for them: They have nothing to earn. They have only to see and hear, believe and receive, repent and reorient to Kingdom life.

And that is where we come back to division. Or should we say poor vision? In and out. Us and them. Included and excluded. Jew and Greek, slave and free, male and female. What a big gulf is represented by that little word: division.

The problems of division come when we look at our lives through our own eyes, rather than through the eyes of Jesus, as revealed by our Holy Grandmother.  We need new glasses for this new reality -- for our eyes will not be healed until that day when our bodied are transformed into ones like Jesus. Until then, we all need glasses. I call them cHesed Glasses....

One of the reasons why I have had to step away from institutional forms of Christianity is kind of like keeping 3D glasses on after you leave the 3D environment. Thinks just don't look right. Images look blurred and flat instead of crisp and bold. I have talked about the 3D quality of my cHesed Glasses, but there is an update needed.  I guess they need to be called 3D Perichoretic cHesed Glasses! ;^)

These 3D pH Glasses are kind of like those glasses said to have been made by Benjamin Franklin for reading the secret map on the back of the Declaration of Independence in the movie National Treasure, staring Nicholas Cage. Depending on which lens combination was being used, different things on the map could be seen....

3D pH Glasses see through the lenses of love, grace and mercy. They show us not only how God's love, grace and mercy are poured out over us at all times...they also show us opportunities for us to share this gracious loving-kindness with all of Creation -- humans, animals, plants, planet.

I have come to see that the glasses that Western Christianity has ground out for us to wear have a prescription that looks more to Plato and Greco-Roman legal constructs (which influenced Augustine, and through him, Luther and Calvin and so many others) than toward Moses and cHesed as covenant relationships. I have become more and more convinced that this is one of the biggest sources of division within the neighborhoods of the Kingdom.

It seems to me that all divisions come, um, from vision problems. I love how Baxter Kruger says that theology is basically just Windex to clean away the dirt and smudges that mar our ability to properly perceive God as they exist as Father, Son and Grandmother. We need to remember to not only wear our 3D pH Glasses, but to regularly clean them with Trinitarian Windex!  That Platonic Windex just doesn't work.

When I am looking out through glasses that are ground to help me see the amazing relationship between Father, Son and Grandmother -- where there is no competition or hierarchy, but only the freedom of Perichoretic cHesed for one another and for me -- it is such a fresh and beautiful sight. But when I look at structures of law and judgment, expectation and responsibility, organization and hierarchy, power and control that so many churches have adopted...well no wonder it gives me a headache!  And when our Platonic Windex only smears without cleaning, we multiply the problems.

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In the end I have to keep reminding myself the division in the Kingdom is not really Real. It's just a bad case of distortion -- one that requires new glasses and proper Trinitarian Windex!  That being said, poor vision is the cause of many an injury...and neighborhood divisions in the Kingdom are the most tragic form of "friendly fire" that exists!

May Jesus help us find ways to replace division with his vision....

Be blessed!


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Here’s the list of other bloggers contributing posts related to healing the divides this month:

• Caris Adel - Emotional Pacifism: Laying Down My Weapons 
• Ty Grigg – Speak Truth 
• Jon Huckins – Gay Marriage, World Vision, and a Unified Church? 
• Mark Votava – Faith Presence in the Parish 
• Mary at Lifeinthedport – let us meet in the borderlands
• Michael Donahoe – Healing Divisions in the Body of Christ  
• Jeremy Myers – Unity vs. Uniformity in the Church 
• Juliet at Still Learning – A Catholics Love Letter to Evangelical Women 
• Dago at Scripture Insights – Jesus the Divider 
• Glenn Hager – The Lowest Common Denominator 
• Sarah Quezada - Standing on Church Bridges 
• Doug Webster – Truth Is Not a Process, Belief Is
• Michelle Van Loon – Bridging the Divide 
• Happy at Simple Felicity – are we there yet? 
• Travis Klassen – The Church: Coming, Going, or Being 
• Bec Cranford - Biblical Interpretation and Inerrancy: Moving beyond myopia to a grander vision of unity
• Teresa Pasquale – Bridging the Divide: Translating Between Dialects, Culture Contexts, and Heart Stirring 
• Miguel Labrador – I might be willing to reconsider church hierarchies, if…
• Paul Meier – Healing the Divides Begins Within 
• Liz Dyer – You Can’t Get There From Here 
• K.W. Leslie – Humility 
• Kathy Escobar – 10 ways we can build bridges instead of bomb them 
• Loveday Anyim – The “non-Gospelized Rituals” of Pentacostalism 
• Caedmon Michael – Bridging the Divides
• Carly Gelsinger – “Church Shopping” at the Wrong “Mall”: A Story of Easter Sundays
• Mallory Pickering – A Splintered People
• Pastor Edwin Fedex – Tearing Down Fences and Building Sidewalks
• Jen Baros – Bridging the Divides: How to Heal 
• Burning Religion – The Impossible Space Between Us 
• Bronwyn Lea – When My Children Squabble
• Christine Sine – Unified by Love Not Doctrine 

Abi has finally come Home for Christmas...

Update:  I have added the rest of the posts for the Synchroblog at the bottom.  Please do check them out as you have time.  You will be blessed!  Abi

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It has been a very long time since I participated in any Synchroblogs out there ... but I had a feeling that I might have something to say this time around.

I grew up in a pretty tight knit family -- Thanksgiving and Christmas and (usually) birthdays were always family time. Family time for our family almost always included the church family's activities ... because we were the church-planting minister's family. If we weren't there and involved, well, things didn't happen....

There are lots of ups and downs to being a PK (preacher's kid)...and this post is not going to talk about any of that. But I have to say that this Christmas will be the first year that I will really "be" home. And that will need a little unpacking....

Regulars of The Virtual Abbess will know that I have been processing heavy things for many years ... and that this past year I've been processing what I have just recently come to call Perichoretic cHesed.  The reason things have finally come together is that I have finally unpacked the last piece of the puzzle (should I more humbly say the next piece?!?) as I continue the process of reconstructing what the journey of Kingdom Life is supposed to look like -- for me, at least.

Home is where family is -- and where one is always welcome. Home always means extended family, too. While I love my biological family, I have lived very far away from them for 22 of my 57 years. Most of the past 18 years have been spent away from them as our nuclear family left Southern California for Washington State.  I had no idea how difficult raising children would be without my extended family in a church family that was not full of relatives ... or people who knew me BK (before kids).

The sad thing that I have come to realize is that I, somehow, did not carry away many "traditions" ... because they were anchored in people who were not where I was.  When I was with them, the traditions lived on. But not here.  Not at the place I called home.

As I have pondered this source of grief, it has finally occurred to me that somehow, I have never really been "home" anywhere ... because I never felt like I fit in. I was useful, most of the time. And that's part of the problem.  Rather than relational, family had turned out to be something more utilitarian. And when you are a broken down person, as I have been for much of the past 18 years, sometimes you're not as useful as folks think you should be. Maybe you no longer fill roles that have come to be expected of you -- in the way that is expected.

Yes, I actually said that out loud....

But I have been pondering a different foundation for family.  One that has been seemingly lost to much of humanity for much too long. I have found that the truest foundation for family comes from the original Family: The Holy and Eternal Trinity.

Father, Son and Holy Spirit have been recognized as the Triune God for a very long time ... but I think that the familial nature of their relationship has not been.  And I think some of that comes from the fact that many have seen the Holy Spirit as either male or gender neutral. I, however, have joined forces with some who have embraced seeing the Spirit as female -- as God our Mother ... or perhaps, as our Grandmother.  There is lots of evidence in the Hebrew for the terms used for the Spirit as being female or feminine.  We know that there are many images of God which are maternal.  I'm not going to argue that here.  You will have do your own searching.  (But both of Wm. Paul Young's books, as well as Baxter Kruger's book, The Shack:  Revisited, may help you as they have helped me.) But in order for the image and nature of God to be seen in humanity, it needed to be expressed in what we know as male and female.  Both are necessary -- one is not more important the the other.  (It seems that even in the Trinity, there only needs to be one female to two males ... please be smiling!!!)

Of course only Jesus, the Father's eternal Son, is actually human and male -- since that first Christmas so long ago.  The other two members of this triad are still whatever it is that they have all been for all eternity. We have been dressing them up in language and images that help us relate to them ... and it is only in Jesus that we have definitive answers.  So, I am finding it terribly helpful to relate to God as Father, Brother and Grandmother -- because of the reality of the new family forged in the New Covenant in Jesus Christ.

[It's okay ... no bolt of lightening has struck me.  God can handle this. It's all good.]

In this Eternal Family I have found my truest family -- the family that is always with me...from which I cannot be separated. They are the Truth about family as it is intended to be.

• I have a Father who loves me with deliberate affection regardless of what I do or don't do.  He is "especially fond of me" as Young has made so famous with his Papa from The Shack. He sees my true self and calls it out into being bit by bit -- regardless of what others think I am or should be.
• I have an Elder Brother who extends me the unmerited favor of grace because I am his little sister and he has crossed all worlds to joyfully bring me -- with  my Adoption Papers -- home to his Father and the Kingdom. He walks with me at all times -- he holds my hand (he holds everything in his hands!)
• I have a Grandmother who breathes wisdom and power on my baby steps -- while showering me with gifts of kindness and mutuality -- so that I make a difference in the family.  I have a part to play in each interaction with my brothers and sisters. I participate in the Eternal Will of God as it is lived out moment by moment. She isn't harsh with me when I don't do things "correctly" ... she is happy that I engage and embrace life.

This family reality I have described is, in essence, what I mean by perichoretic cHesed.  It is being part of the family while still being myself. It is resting -- relaxing! -- in the love of Father, the grace of Jesus, the mercy of Grandmother -- knowing that They are holding everything together, making everything work together for good, teaching me the family recipes and traditions.

This Christmas, I will be home for the first time.  I'm not quite sure exactly what it's going to be like compared with the previous 56 experiences ... but I do know that it will be filled with more hope and love and joy and peace than any Christmas I've known. I'm going to relax into it and be surprised by joy....

I am reminded of the line from Sleepless in Seattle, when Sam is describing to Dr. Marsha what it was like when he first held the hand of the woman who would become his wife:  "It was like coming home, only to no home I'd ever known."

As I finish typing this, I can almost hear them clapping and shouting:  "Welcome home, child.  We have been waiting for you for so long. Come on in and join the dancing and singing ... and you don't really need your dancing shoes anymore!"

Be blessed this Christmas -- may you find yourself coming home to no home you've ever known, too!  I'll see you there...  ;^)

Abi

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Other bloggers writing so far about “coming home” this advent:

• Christine Sine - Is There Room for Jesus to Find a Home In Your Heart?
• Jeremy Myers - It Sounds Like Christmas
• Nathan Kitchen - Coming Home
• Michelle at Moments with Michelle - Home 
• Mallory Pickering - I’m Kind of Homesick 
• Bobi Ann Allen - Coming Home 
• J.A. Carter - Going Home 
• Glenn Hager - Where the Adventure Begins 
• Marta Layton - Can You Ever Come Home Again? 
• Peggy at Abisomeone - Abi Has Finally Come Home For Christmas 
• Amy Hetland - Coming Home 
• Coffeesnob - Home 
• Carol Kuniholm - Advent Three: Redefining Home 
• Liz Dyer - Advent 2013 The Way Home 
• Harriet Long - The Body and the Sacred: Coming Home 
• Edwin Pastor Fedex Aldrich - Who I Was Made to Be 
• Emkay Anderson - Homemaking
• Anita Coleman - At Home in the Kingdom of God
• Kathy Escobar – Mobile Homes (Not That Kind) 

Abi and Brokenness....

Updated...see below!

I have written about Oprah a couple of times.  I have tremendous respect for her, although I do not agree with everything she says or does.  That's normal, I think.  If you have problems with Oprah, I humbly ask you to suspend disbelief (J.R.R. Tolkien's lovely term) long enough to hear what I'm saying.  You'll be okay.

Anyway, today's lead article in her Spirit Newsletter struck me as timely.  It came as an answer to a fervent prayer.  It is not perfect, either; but it gave me several bits of encouragement.  These I will share with you. Some come right out of the article, others are my thoughts that came from reading.  Please read the original article first, if you haven't already ... the rest of this post will still be here when you get back.  Go ahead; it's not very long.  ;^)

Here's the stream of consciousness that made me get out my pen and paper and capture some thoughts:

• Everyone is broken from time to time.  Um, this would resonate with the abbess of the purple martyrdom.
• Breaking is necessary for enlargement.  I could write an entire series on this profound thought.
• Enlargement comes by being present in all ways, in all directions. I struggle with this and I am astounded by the variety of ways this little gem keeps popping up in my journey.
• Being present is the practice of holding nothing back.  Dr. Brown would call this part of the courage that comes from being wholehearted.  Her thoughts have been echoing Dr. Kruger's thoughts, especially his teaching on the "I am not..." problem, which she states as "Never enough."  Profound.

He then gives four steps to finding wholeness and health and growth:

Accept the weather

• It is what it is....
• Every "crack" is an opening
• ...The Light of Jesus, there in the deepest darkness in our souls, shines out through our cracks.  Makes me think of this passage.
• ...What is opened is always more important that what breaks us.
• ...Don't get stuck in your list of legitimate grievances.  Yeah, this is very big.

Lean into the tender places

• Letting the wind of life rush in and tough the tender spots is the beginning of resilience.  This is very deep and I'm still processing it....

What kind of "part" am I in what kind of "whole"?  This is the whole "identity crisis" issue, right here!

• My response:  I am a daughter of the Heavenly Father, sister to Jesus, the Father's Eternal Son, and dancing partner with the Holy Spirit in the Life of the Blessed Trinity.
• This Truth is foundational and is what has been undermined by the "I am not..." and "Never enough" curse of human culture.  Sigh...it is pernicious!
• When blinded by the pain and darkness, I need to remember to look for the Light shining through those broken, cracked spots.
• ...Embrace what can emerge by allowing Jesus to clean away the broken bits.
• ...Sometimes we emerge like those beautiful Oriental bowls that have been repaired with gold....
• ...Sometimes we emerge like butterflies struggling to escape from their cocoon. Transformation is often mistaken for rejection or heresy by those who do not have eyes to see what the Spirit has been doing.

Look beyond the broken

• In each of us, the Holy Spirit has planted a unique seed.  Different seeds go through different processes of germination.  They remain dormant until the time and environment are right ... the fullness of time, as it were.
• ...what is too dry for some is just right for others
• ...what is to warm for some is not hot enough for others
• ...what is nutrient-dense to some is too rich for others

Sometimes I think I am one of those seeds that need a hot fire to neutralize my cocoon of enzymes and allow the seed to germinate.  Yeah, burning down the forest is not a good time. but if that is the only way to awaken the sleeping life inside my soul....

Be blessed as you persevere on your journey.  

• May the Light shine through the cracks of your broken heart. 

• May the Light that is in you overpower the whispered evil of the "I am not...never enough" that has flourished in your darkened soul.

• May the sweet burn of the cleaning pool restore you to your True Identity after Aslan's powerfully sharp claws have torn away the knobby dragon hide that imprisoned you.  Love C.S. Lewis!  Do you know Eustace?  (And, yes, I will forever be sorry that they did not put that powerful scene in the movie of The Voyage of the Dawn Treader....)   Update:  you can listen to the chapter here!

• May the great I AM embrace you in Their cHesed and gently lead you into Their Great Dance.

On Being Grounded....

I have been spending a lot of time journaling in a couple of notebooks ... and I find that things I think I have blogged about, um, I actually haven't. So, to remedy that, I will be going through those notebooks and bringing out some of the things that continue to resonate.

One that I will get to soon is my personal "ah ha" moment about "living water" and just what it is. But before I do that, I want to talk about feet and holy ground and grounding and perichoresis. No, really, it's must easier to understand than it is to explain. Really.

For those of you who know me better, you will know that I have been learning a lot about resonant frequencies and their importance to health over the past 12 years or so. And while there is a lot of nonsense written, there are some gems to be found by those willing to dig and sift diligently.

While some have chosen to discredit theories of "electromagnetic/electrostatic pollution" over the years, the science is beginning to be collected about these subtle, invisible fields and their effects on life forms (human, plant, animal).

Quick disclaimer break: I am so not a scientist, but I do have significant doses of common sense and intuition and have read some important books about this. You will have to go and do your own study without being unduly prejudiced by the nay-sayers. Take a look at this interesting article for more pondering about this.

Okay, here's the bottom line for this meandering post: the best way for humans to discharge their accumulation of electrostatic charges is to "ground" themselves by walking barefoot on the, um, ground -- grass, sand and dirt are the best. Going barefoot also allows the body's diverse neurological systems (especially the brain and digestive tract) to become better entrained to the earth's resonant frequency -- which is tuned for relaxation and harmony. Which means, of course, that wearing shoes interferes with this connection.

All of this has come into focus for me as I pondered the wonders of walking on the beach and standing in the surf and allowing my feet to be buried in the sand ... and how much better my feet and ankles have felt as a result. When I mentioned this to my chiropractor, she said that I had been experiencing the ultimate in "grounding" therapy.

So, today I was out working in my garden ... and decided to bury my toes in the pile of sand that was left over from tilling sand into our clay/soil in preparation for planting. And as I was wiggling my toes and settling my feet into the sand, this thought popped into my head. "This is why God required Moses to take off his shoes by the burning bush -- God did not want there to be any interference from his connection with Moses. He wanted Moses to be fully grounded and entrained to God's resonance." There was nothing "unholy" about Moses' sandals that required that they be removed. It was God inviting Moses into a special relationship -- one that turned into an amazing "friendship" -- of Moses being called the friend of God, who talked with him "face to face".

I imagine that God had a similar relationship early on in the Garden with Adam and Eve -- walking in the garden together in the cool of the evening....

Being barefoot is the quintessential state of being comfortable, isn't it? I love the thought that our loving Father wants us to walk with him in such a way that we are able to "ground" the "static" we collect all around us and be entrained to the calming resonance of this wonderful earth he created as our home.

But more than being physically barefoot, Father invites us to dance with him and Jesus and the Holy Spirit -- a dance free of shoes that hurt our spiritual feet ... that desensitize them from being stepped on or stepping on another ... that make it easier to trip or twist an ankle ... that even take over the focus with brands and colors and styles of shoes ... that track in dirt or mar the floor ... that make such a clunking and clinking racket.

So I'm going to go to the store and buy a couple of bags of "sandbox sand" and pour it into the wading pool on our deck ... and I'm going to take off my shoes and stand in the water and let my feet sink into the sand. I'm also going to think about ways I can take my spiritual shoes off so that I can dance more freely and more in tune with the music of the Great Dance.

Join me?